Some decisions are easy to make.
A neighbour has had some huge problems recently which have resulted in a husband being booted out and a wife leaning heavily on friends for support.
Unfortunately she has also leaned heavily on vodka.
Mostly this is done out of sight of her 5 and 6 year old but last night… Not so much.
We hold a key for her and her teen son so evening knocks are expected.
Last night she spent with a mate and at ten we had a rat a tat tat on the door. Jo jumped up to answer it and said neighbour all but fell in on her. The kids were in tow too (it’s a school night).
“I’m so shorry, I’m a dishgrace” she slurred. We didn’t disagree, just gave her the keys. Gill watched the children into the house.
When our kids had gone to bed we discussed what to do next.
Gill went over to peer into the house and saw her asleep on the sofa and no sign of the little ones.
If it continues it will mean a call to Children’s Services. We can’t avoid that.
Hopefully the kids will make it into school today but if they don’t the school will react as their punctuality and attendance is dreadful.
It would easy to pontificate on this situation, even in the light of her husband’s dalliance. I’ll try not to.
The way I read it is that, as parents, we have ALL made decisions in the past which were wrong for our kids. Most of us see them, feel the guilt and try to learn from our mistakes.
(You’re nodding, aren’t you?)
We’re human and producing kids doesn’t suddenly elevate us to sainthood. Hopefully, the mistakes we make aren’t so large and bloody stupid that we scar our young’ns for life.
However, how a parent handles drink isn’t a hard decision to make.
Gill and I are very casual drinkers: I have a couple of bottles of ale at the weekend (just 2) and she goes to a friends and has a few drinks over the course of the evening and comes home relaxed but not drunk.
We never drink in front of the children unless it’s festive wine at the table.
It was an easy obvious, decision to make when they were tiny. (We weren’t heavy drinkers anyway)
On the one hand I feel for the woman. I think she’s turned a blind eye to what he gets up to for years now. Now it’s come to a head (not a pun, you witty people) it’s all come crashing down on her.
But on the other, how you deal with the shitty grotty bits of life is the measure of your character.
Life happens and then it goes on. Two tinies need a strong Mum to look out for them, not a lush.
….. that’s pontificating, isn’t it? Bugger.
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